Inconsistent and Unreliable
When we met Oyin, we were hopeful that we got a good nanny for our 10 months old son. We agreed her hours and rate more than 3 weeks before she resumed. I also checked in at least twice to be sure that we were still in agreement (before she resumed), as I wasn't keen on being surprised at the last minute. We also that agreed 2 weeks notice if anyone decides to call quits so it gives us enough time to get a replacement.
She resumed on the Monday, 7th of August (Week 1). On the morning of Wednesday the 9th, she sent a message at 8 03am- " Good morning
I’m so sorry I won’t be able to make come today. I woke up with a bad cold and headache. I should make it in tomorrow.
I’m very sorry once again."
I asked her to get well soon and she said she was feeling better by the end of the day and would show up on Thursday and Friday (which she did)
Week 2 (Aug 14-18), She showed up for 4 days again. She sent me a message on Tuesday morning at 8.13am, "Hello
I won’t be able to make it in today please
I’ve got a family emergency. My partner is at the hospital.
Thanks for your understanding."
My response, "No worries. I hope he's better soon."
She shows up rest of the week but asks to work 9am to 2pm on Friday because she has a hair appointment, which I agreed to.
On Thursday, we had a conversation about reducing her days and she seemed excited about it. I told her I had found someone who said she was available on Tuesday and Thursday (I was going to ask the lady to cover one out of the 2 days she was available), she chose Thursday but then I asked if she could make it Tuesday instead, she agreed. I asked her if this arrangement would mean that we can rely on her to show up for the remaining 4 days, she affirmed "yes'. However, this arrangement was set to happen in September.
Week 3 (Aug 21-25) She showed up on Monday, sends me a message at 9.05am, that she has another health challenge and would be in pain for 2 days.
At this point, the absences were becoming concerning, so I sent her a message,
"Re: Absences
It's okay if you have other engagements and will not be able to work with us full time. We can accept that, and we will make arrangements ahead of time.
As mentioned last week, these unexpected time-off throw us off guard and affect our productivity at work.
Please let us know if we should start looking for a replacement for you."
Her response, "Hi
I’m sorry it looks that way and it’s looking like I’m not the right fit for you family.
For your convenience, you can start looking for a replacement."
I expected her to show up on Thursday and Friday, since we agreed 2 weeks notice. However, I sent a message to her to confirm but she ignored my message, never responded, never showed up. "Hello Oyin,
Can you confirm if you'll be coming in tomorrow and Friday and when you intend to stop working for us?"
I'm still trying to figure out if I did something to warrant the service/treatment I received from her.
Her duties were feeding DS, changing his diapers and rocking him to bed. 98% of the time, we (husband and I) made the baby food and gave her to feed.
When baby was asleep (which was for at least 2 out of the 5 hours she worked), we didn't bother her.
I wish her all the best in her future endeavors.
Response from Oyin
Responded
Thank you for your review. I regret that my time working for your family ended abruptly.
I found the home environment to be quite uncomfortable and not very conducive to doing my job effectively. The living space felt cramped and hardly was any window opened for fresh air circulation. Caring for a baby requires ventilation. In such closed quarters without proper ventilation, it was difficult to stay energetic and engage with the child for long periods.
However, the breaking point for me was the dressing issue. We had earlier agreed that I dressed “appropriately” for work. Only for me to be told one day that my dressing was “too revealing” and I shouldn’t dress that way again because the daughter woke up that morning and wanted to dress like me. This was alarming to me because of 1. It was summer, the weather was hot, and my dress wasn’t revealing in any way. 2. I got the blame for how the daughter chose to dress in under 12 hours. It was at this point I realised I wasn’t the right fit for the family if I wanted the best for both parties. I couldn’t put my health and the baby’s development at risk because of the refusal to open windows for ventilation and I wouldn’t want to be said to be the “influence” on the daughter. I’ve worked with families, and they’ve always given good references.
I wish you and your family all the best going forward. Thank you for the opportunity to work with your baby - it was a good learning experience overall.
